by David Berardelli
Sexy, sassy and dead, Tiffany LeBouf is pulled into Hell by the incompetent demon Gutril. Paired with the demon Chip, she is sent to find Gutril after he is summoned to Ohio by a teenage girl goofing off with a spell she'd found online . They are given three days to find Gutril and bring him back before he can select a mortal host and remain here.
As a spirit, Tiffany finds that she has the ability to change her breast size at will and conjure up any outfits she desires. She also realizes that her new powers can keep her from being forced to return to Hell.
Question: I finally got someone whose writing I admire to read one of my stories. He said, "Not bad, but it needs a better opening hook!" Handed it back and changed the subject. Any ideas on how to fix that?
Answer: Opening hooks are always tricky. Usually, your best bet is to go ahead and write the story and worry about that opening hook when it's done. So the good news is that you are in the best place to write one.
The first "hook" in a story usually foreshadows the central problem that will challenge the protagonist. A hook should raise a question in the mind of the reader that will be answered before the story is over. But not too soon before it's over. Hooks heighten reader interest, pure and simple.