Dialogue Question

When Nancy Hunter meets Peter Allen, sparks don't exactly fly, but there is definitely something worth exploring between them. Imagine their surprise when they discover they have loved each other for centuries, through life after life after life.

Question from the e-mail:  I see in your submission guidelines that you say "Everything a person says should go in one paragraph, even if they change the subject." I was always taught to change paragraphs whenever the topic changed. And if someone continues to speak, not to close the quotes.  Why isn't that correct.

Answer: Good to hear from you Sherry.  I'm sure you were taught well. Those are the rules most of us are taught in college. You were probably also taught that the period always goes outside the quotation marks, too. That is correct, if you are typing an term paper, but not if you are writing a book.

In a book dialogue is when two characters talk to one anoyther. The object of the punctuation there is not to give two arguments that say the same thing, and from two different sources, but to make clear what emotions each character is showing, or concealing.

Writing teachers have lots of rules. Publishers only have two:

NEVER confuse the reader.

NEVER make work for your editor.

Now punctuating dialogue is a bit tricky. First of all, you never let two characters talk in the same paragraph. Commas and other punctuation go inside the quotes. And you must paragraph each time a new person speaks.

Finally, Everything a person says at one time (even if they change the subject) goes in the same paragraph. There are exceptions to that rule, for instance if someone is making a formal speech at a graduation or political rally. But in conversation, don't use the new paragraph, no close quote deal as most readers expect a new person to speak when a new paragraph appears and not giving them that cue will CONFUSE them.

When an editor sees that in a ms. it signals two things.

First and most important, they will have to scour all the dialogue in the book to fix it. That will take a lot of extra time and, if the book is a good one and they get distracted too much by the story, they are bound to miss some.

It also means the writer either hasn't read the submission guidelines, or he thinks the rules don't apply to him.

I can't stress too much how important it is to punctuate dialogue correctly.

Escape the terrible Winter...eat dragon toes

Book One of Six 

Exciting Sword and Sorcery Adventures

Fans of Tolkein will love it.

This will keep you reading for awhile!

In Book One of the Red Knight Series, Judicator, Gwendolyn the Celebate, is kidnapped to join an “army of the dead” led by Victor. She embraces the future and her new identity as Captain Isobel. Isobel revels in her acceptance by the other warriors, and tries not to be too disturbed by some shady areas in Gwendolyn’s past. She is impressed by the Army’s domestication of dragons, and the sophisticated magical powers possessed by some of them. Though “Gwendolyn” has died and Isobel has taken her place, it soon becomes clear that someone is trying to kill her, or Victor, or both.

Dragon Toes Recipe

Ingredients

24 habanero peppers
24 scallops, muscles removed
24 slices bacon
Special equipment: 8 wooden skewers

Directions

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Slice the tops of the peppers off and discard the tops but keep the membranes. Place the scallops inside the peppers. Starting at one end, roll each pepper in 1 slice of bacon. Skewer the dragon toe through the center, placing 3 toes per skewer.

Roast in the oven for 12 minutes.

For the snowbound

Shannon Delaney's writing assignment in San Diego opens new doors for her young career. She has no idea that her temporary home, the Victorian-era Blackthorne House mansion is a portal to a century-old mystery. On her first night a ghostly encounter entagles her in the spectral mission of the mansion's original owner-Eric Blackthorne, master magician. Complicating matters is Alex Blackthorne, handsome and charming descendent of the ghostly magician. Also, there's Zach Zavala, who has guy-next-door good looks and a straightforward manner. Plus, Zach's grandfather Francisco is a retired detective and a kindred spirit who appreciates Shannon's apprehension about her paranormal experiences.

The first in a series of five. 

Great read for anyone snowbound.

Recipe for Snow Cream

Ingredients

• 1 cup of milk
• 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
• 1/2 cups sugar
• CLEAN Snow

Preparation

Put on your warm clothes and take the kids outside to collect 4 - 5 cups of fresh, clean snow. Don't pack the snow, just scoop it up. Bring it in the house and set it in the freezer while you prepare the other ingredients.
Mix together the milk, vanilla, and the sugar. Stir this mixture until the sugar is dissolved. Slowly add the snow to your mixture, stirring constantly, until it is as thick as ice cream. Now it is ready to east and enjoy

Characters?

Night was beginning to fall in the tranquil mountain valley, and the long workday at the Topps’ family farm had come to an end. The unmistakable sound of the elks’ trumpeting calls had also returned to the valley - announcing the beginning of their mating season. It was truly a wondrous time for the elk, but it could also be a very dangerous time; especially when the elk began wandering down the old wagon train trail from the mountains, down to where the early morning frost had not yet fallen on the tender green grasses.

 Question from the e-mail:  How do you describe a Character?

Answer: Basic description when we first meet the character! Later references to an emotional expression or other important feature.

Be careful about that first description, though. Don't let it get to be an information dump.

Describing a character feature by feature can get to sound like a catalogue. I like a general description or to describe one thing and leave the rest up to the reader’s imagination. The key thing is to describe them when they are first mentioned, before the reader’s imagination kicks in.

There’s a good example of how to do this in my mystery story, “Final Exit’ Free for an e-mailed request if  you wanted to see the description of the two main characters, a brother and sister.

       Jill leaned closer. “That woman over there thinks we’re twins.” She nodded toward a woman in large improbable pearls who surveyed them through opera glasses.

   Actually, Jon knew they looked alike. Same dark eyes, same straight nose, same generous mouth. But his hair was dark where Jill’s was fair, and his jaw was square while Jill’s pointed chin gave her face a heart shape.

Catching UP!

Books that went to press or back to press this week:  

THE BOY WHO COULD UNDERSTAND ANIMALS, by Evelyn Frederick Moll.  It was a normal, hot summer day for Josh Sparkins…lazily swinging in a hammock and thinking about the upcoming school year. Then thoughts of his Gramps’s Ancient Magic book pop into his head.

Galleys that went out, or went out again this week:  

 

ROYAL PRINCESS: WIFE AND MOTHER, Royal Hearts of Mondoverde Series, Vol. 1 by Anna Dynowski  

    Prince Stefano, Crown Prince of Mondoverde, never shirks the responsibilities attached to his privileged position. Born to reign and trained from birth, he accepts his life is not his own and does not complain about his duties to the House of Graziani, at least, not publically. But now he must wed and produce the next heir to the throne. Can he find a woman who is willing to take him on, embrace the public life of a royal princess, and produce the required heir? 

THE CHILD ON THE TERRACE: A Dangerous Journeys Mystery, Vol. 4, by Virgina Winters

    Anne McPhail, retired pediatrician, shattered by her experience in Bermuda, rents a tiny house in Setenil, Spain, hoping to reconcile what she learned about herself and Thomas after the gunfire in that dark room on the island.

 

Work began or Continued on the following:

 

Work began or Continued on the following books:    

 

PIRATES OF THE EASTERN SHORE, by Andy Nunez

    Another in Andy Nunez's popular Eastern Shore Series. This one explores Pirates treasure buried along the Atlantic seaboard, visits to the Delmarva Penninsula by Captain Kidd and Blackbeard, to the Oyster Wars of the 20th Century.

 

THE KIDNAPPING OF SEN. ANDY THOMPSON: Adventures on Capital Hill Series, Vol. 2. 

   by Celine Rose Mariotti
  

    Do you ever wonder what it would be like to have U.S. Senators who really did their job, got along well, and stood up for what was right? This is not your typical book about politics.  It’s the perfect U.S. Senate!  Throughout the book, there is an ongoing health care debate.  Senators Andy Thompson and Hunt Wagner lead the way with a resolution to try to stop President Robinson and Secretary von Schumann from sending troops to Botswana.  But a real adventure begins when Senator Thompson is kidnapped and Brian Travors, the Deputy Assistant Secretary of State is suspected of being involved.  Senators Hunt Wagner and Darius Clemens head a committee hearing to get to the truth.  President Robinson suffers a heart attack and Vice-President Barry Newman takes over temporarily.  This book is a real page turner!  Read it and you’ll have hope for tomorrow!

  

  THEN CAME HEAVEN,  by Gilda Arruda. A novel of love, loss, and faith.

 

 

 

 

Earthquake in Messina Italy, in the early 20th Century

STORYBOOK II, by Elena Dorothy Bowman

      Within the pages of this book are stories that my mother once told me; of certain incidences that she remembered. But mostly it is compiled of the memories that were a part of all our lives.
    There were happy times and there were sad times. It was a time of struggle, of prosperity, of joblessness, of wondering where the next paycheck would come from.  Times when a “breadwinner” didn’t have the money to buy a quart of milk, put bread on the table, or a dime to ride the trolley to work. Even a time when the poor didn’t know they were poor. But always, a family that stood together no matter what problems they were facing.  
 

 
THE MURDER OF SEC. JUDD KANE: Adventures on Capital Hill Series, Vol. 2. 

   by Celine Rose Mariotti
  
    Do you ever wonder what it would be like to have U.S. Senators who really did their job, got along well, and stood up for what was right? This is not your typical book about politics.  It’s the perfect U.S. Senate!  Throughout the book, there is an ongoing health care debate.  Senators Andy Thompson and Hunt Wagner lead the way with a resolution to try to stop President Robinson and Secretary von Schumann from sending troops to Botswana.  But a real adventure begins when Senator Thompson is kidnapped and Brian Travors, the Deputy Assistant Secretary of State is suspected of being involved.  Senators Hunt Wagner and Darius Clemens head a committee hearing to get to the truth.  President Robinson suffers a heart attack and Vice-President Barry Newman takes over temporarily.  This book is a real page turner!  Read it and you’ll have hope for tomorrow!

REVEREND CASTLE'S CRISIS, Rev. Castle series, Vol. 2 by Celine Rose Mariotti
 
   Rev. Castle is back in another cozy mystery.

BLEEDING HEARTS: Killian Kendal Mystery Series, Vol. 1
   Winner of the Stonewall Society's 2002 Pride in the Arts Literary Award in the Whodunit Category!

REAP THE WHIRLWIND: Killian Kendall Mystery Series, Vol. 2,  by Josh Aterovis.
   Suicide, or murder? That's the question in the second Killian Kendall mystery. Will Smith suspects murder when an old childhood pal drowns, and asks his friend Killian for help in solving the mystery.

TRUTH OF YESTERDAY,  by Josh Aterovis

ALL LOST THINGS, by Josh Aterovis

CHANGE  OF WORLDS, by Josh Aterovis

Jack's News!

  by your bookstore cat, 
gossip columnist, and feline friend.

Hi Everybody!

 

Here's hoping you had a wonderful holiday and wishing everyone all the best and plenty of success for the coming year.  Roger and Arline are both better, though they are still sleeping past breakfast...

 

Here's some news from the Eastern Shore Writers Association, who are offering a book prize for a book written by an author who lives on the Delmarva Peninsula.  Here's a copy of the whole notice:

 

                        FROM: THE EASTERN SHORE WRITERS' ASSOCIATION

 2015 DELMARVA BOOK PRIZE GUIDELINES

The managers of the 2015 Delmarva Book Prize for $1000 are seeking books from all categories and genres —fiction, non-fiction, poetry. The contest is open to permanent and seasonal residents of the Delmarva Peninsula (from the Chesapeake and Delaware Canal to Cape Charles, VA).

The prize will be presented to a book carrying an ISBN number and a first publication date of 2015.

The entrance fee is $25 per submission.

Submit your entry before 11/1/15 for consideration of the 2015 prize. Books with a firm publication date before 12/31/15 will be eligible. To submit your work, contact the prize coordinator at sweeneygf@aol.com.

The announcement of the winner and two finalists will be made in December, 2015. 

Board members of the Eastern Shore Writers Association (ESWA) and the ESWA Education Fund are ineligible for the prize. 

By submission, an entrant or legal representative certifies that the entry is legal and that the entrant is the legal owner of the copyright. ESWA will not be liable for illegal submissions.

Any entry not conforming to the guidelines will be disqualified. ESWA will respect the intellectual property rights of entrants and will only use submissions for limited use of the prize.

ESWA reserves the right to reject any entry or change criteria without notice. Submission fees and books will not be returned.

 

Arline is always glad to know what ESWA is up to, as -- back in the day -- she was one of the founders of that organization, and she also helped write their Tax Free Status application and worked hard on their early published works. Now, due to her mobility issues, she is unable to go to meetings, but I know she thinks well of that organization and of all Delmarva writers.

 

I know WE here at Write Words have already done some books with as First Edition date of 2015, TINY TIMELESS TALES comes to mind and we are hard at work on Andy Nunez's PIRATES. That would qualify, as well. 

 

Arline is working on the Payroll. In fact, I think she is planning to send out Paypal payments today. The checks, as usual, will take a little longer.

 

 She's moaning, because sales are down, but they always are, this time of year, because folks are spending their discretionary funds on holiday gifts.

Don't forget to let me know what you are all up to! Just send me an e-mail with "News for Jack" in the subject line, and I'll make sure it shows up here. 

 

10 Degrees Outside, but...

...At least we can dream about Golf!

June at Shimmering Lake Golf Club on the shore of Canandaigua Lake and the five-week beer-cart-girl certification program is in full swing. It’s a very popular program and a great way for any college girl to start her summer, but this year it could also turn out to be very dangerous.

Strange things start to happen and throw in December 21, 2012, a solar cataclysm, a missing ancient Egyptian necklace, the CIA, Middle Eastern terrorists, and it’s a lot more than Verne bargained for when he left his high-powered Wall Street position to purchase the course. Luckily, two aspiring beer cart girls are determined to help him straighten out this mess and, in the process, for a few believers, help save the world.

Golf Ball Recipes

Original recipe makes 6 dozen C

• 1 pound confectioners' sugar
• 1 1/2 cups chunky peanut butter
• 1 cup butter
• 2 cups flaked coconut

• 1 cup chopped walnuts
• 1 cup graham cracker crumbs
• 1 1/2 pounds semisweet chocolate chips
  1/2 lb white baker's chocolate 

Directions

1. Mix sugar, peanut butter, butter, coconut, walnuts, and graham cracker crumbs in a large bowl using hands until thoroughly blended. Roll 1 inch balls and place on a baking sheet. Chill for 1 hour in the refrigerator.
2. Melt the white chocolate in a microwave-safe glass or ceramic bowl in 30 second intervals, stirring after each melting, for 1 to 3 minutes (depending on your microwave). Do not overheat or chocolate will scorch. 
3.  Dip peanut butter balls into the chocolate until they are completely coated. Replace in refrigerator and  allow chocolate to harden before serving.

More Good News!

We have another FINALIST 

for the Epic Awards!!

Lynn Slaughter writes  to say:

While I Danced has been named a finalist in the "Young Readers" category for EPIC's eBook Awards 2015. Cross your fingers for me, and thanks again for all of your support and encouragement.

A nerve-wracking audition for a summer ballet workshop reminds fifteen-year-old Cass how much she wishes her mom hadn’t died so young. Her dad isn’t exactly Mr. Encouragement when it comes to her dancing, and he shuts down whenever she asks about her mother. Cass feels as though her life is a puzzle with a giant piece missing.

Dancing has become her safe place where she doesn’t have to think about why her father won’t discuss her mother, or why her best friend and boyfriend are acting weird.

But as she moves closer to her dream of a career in ballet, Cass uncovers secrets her friends have been keeping. Then, in the midst of an intensely competitive summer dance program and the beginnings of a new romance with a fellow dancer, she makes an even more devastating discovery, a betrayal that leaves her questioning whether she even wants to dance at all.

In a year when everything Cass has ever believed about her life turns out to be false, can she heal and forgive? And can she find her own way to pursue her passion for dance?

ISBN 978-1-61386-259-9 Young Adult, Romance, Ballet, Dance,