Whose Eyes Are You Looking THROUGH?

Chesapeake Series, vol. 4 

by Terry L. White

Jewel LeCompte is raised to be a lady, her blindness notwithstanding, but the events of the Civil War introduce her to the harsh reality of the work that goes with running an Eastern Shore plantation.

After the war, Jewel marries Carroll Taylor, who takes her home to the plantation known as Baron's Hope. Happy and expecting her first child, Jewel is finally learning to read Braille through the help of a tutor from Baltimore. Unfortunately Carroll is swept away by a monster tide generated by one of the hurricanes that regularly scour the Atlantic coast.

Jewel finds she must run not one, but two plantaions.Overseers Daniel Merryweather and Michael Elliott learn just how strong this woman really is as she survives with courage and hope, eventually finding love to sustain her life in the Land of Pleasant Living.

Whose Eyes Are You Looking THROUGH?

Question:  A writer in my group just throws in a scene break any time she wants to change viewpoint. And yes, I agree with her that you DO need one if you are going to change the viewpoint character. But sometimes there are three "scene breaks" within ONE conversation. Isn't a scene supposed to have structure, too? Shouldn't there be more reason  for a change of scene than just because you want another character to react by thinking something?

Answer:  Yes, dramatic scenes should be structured and they should have a dramatic dynamic. Having too many very short scene breaks  can make a manuscript feel "choppy" to the reader and cause him or her to lose interest in the action.

Every dramatic scene has the same structure.  Here it is:

    1. Transition, preferably with hook

    2. Rising action and dialogue

    3. Turning point of the scene (the place where something changes forever)
        (if nothing changes, the scene is unnecessary, no matter how much fun it was to write)

    4. End/resolution of the scene, preferably with another hook. Usually when we come to the end of a scene,

    * * *

we indicate it with the double line break, at least two extra lines of "white space" and most people use the three stars, a line, or some other other searchable indication, if someone will use their manuscript to typeset a book one day. Many typesetting programs close up all blank lines. Small publishers, and even big ones, usually use the electronic manuscript file the author sends to typeset the manuscript. This is why it has become so important to send  in pristine manuscripts.

Once the turning point is reached, then a final hook for that scene is set, and the scene ends.  The Scene Ends Right There! Yes, as soon as the point is made, STOP and end with a question, regardless of what else might have happened in real time.

If you are in one character's viewpoint, and want to show what another character is thinking, there are other ways than saying "she thought." 

One way to get emotion across for a character, when we're in another character's viewpoint, is to use body language to express their inner feelings. We all read body language all the time. It does no good for someone to tell us, "I'm not upset at all," if their face is red, and their arms are crossed firmly on their chest, while one foot jerks from the knee. 

There is almost no difference between the reader's reaction to the following in a scene where Mary is lying to Colin and you want to indicate that he thinks she's lying. The first way uses the example of  a switch to his viewpoint.

 Example 1:

Mary tried her best to convince Colin that she had  not be unfaithful.

* * *

Colin thought she was lying.

* * *

Mary stared at him, wondering how she could make him believe her.

* * *

She wasn't going to get away with this, Colin thought, as he slammed the door. 


Example 2:

Mary tried her best to convince Colin that she had not been unfaithfil. No matter how many times she told him so, he just stood there and stared with a look of disbelief on his face.

"You have to believe me. John means nothing to me! It's you, I love."  She wept as Colin turned, walked out, and slammed the door.


Example one shows us Colin's thoughts from inside his head.  But in example two, we have no doubt as to what Colin is thinking, do we?

LIGHT Reading

Misty Cove Chronicles, Vol. 1

by Nikki Leigh

     First in a series of three. Days before her wedding, in October 1841, Lizbeth climbs to the widows walk atop her home, with her fiancé. They search the dark and stormy horizon for her father's fishing boat and Lizbeth notices the darkened lighthouse on the point. In such a violent storm, her father and the other men from Misty Cove need the lighthouse to guide their boats safely into harbor. In the morning and the lighthouse lamps shine out, but it's too late. Death had come in the stormy night and the community is devastated by loss. Is love enough for Lizbeth to overcome the needless death of her father? Mourning and an investigation into the light's failure delay the wedding. When, at last, Lizbeth and William pledge their love, will they find happiness?

Light Dreams

Great to nibble while you read.

Ingredients

36 servings43 cal. 

• 1/2 cup butter
• 1 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/3 cup white sugar

• 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
• 1 teaspoon lemon extract
• 1/4 tsp Lemon zest

Directions

Print 

1. Melt butter and let cool to room temperature. 
2. Cream in sugar until smooth and light yellow. 
3. Add lemon zest and extract and mix well. 
4. Sift flour and baking powder and add to mixture, mixing well. Knead dough lightly on board. 
5. **Cover and refrigerate for one hour.
6. Preheat oven to 300 degrees F (150 degrees C). Roll dough into a log 1 inch in diameter. Cut off slices 1/3 to 1/2 inch thick. Roll slices into balls and place on cookie sheet 1 1/2 inches apart. Slightly dent the top of each with a fingertip.
7. **This recipe can also be used with a cookie press. Add a little milk if texture is too stiff.
8. Bake 25 to 30 minutes, or until light golden in color.

Catching UP!

Books that Went to Press, or Went to Press 

Again, this week.

WANTED: ROYAL PRINCESS SHOCK AND AWE, Royal  Hearts of Mondoverde Series, Vol. 4., by Anna Dynowski

    Prince Maximillian, the playboy prince, is having way too much fun with the ladies, young and old and everything in between, to keep his name clean. Incorrigible, he’s been synonymous with scandalous headlines since he turned sixteen. While his laughing eyes, smooth talk, and charming manner make him the darling

of Mondoverde, or at least, with the female population, the Graziano royal family despairs of him ever settling down. But can he find a woman who will rein in his wild streak and fix his princely image?

Galleys that went out, or went out again,  this week:

HAIL MARY by C.M. Albrecht

Three slightly tarnished Golden Girls step out.

   

    When retired cop Harry “Bulldog” Drummond dies, his free-spirited widow Mary, suddenly freed from the Bulldog’s strait-laced ideas, recruits a couple of gals from her colorful past and the girls go on a tear. Meaning they create mayhem wherever they show up, much

to the consternation of Mary’s son, Creighton. Poor Cray just lost his job, he has a wife, two kids, two mortgages, a lazy dog and an old Chevy he was planning to replace with a new Jaguar. But the big raise he

expected has vanished and so has his mother…along with his aging Chevy. 

   To make matters worse, she doesn’t even have a driver’s license!

Work began or continued on the following books this week:

   An Indonesian army general's son, who recently graduated high school, continues his education at a college in San Francisco. The 19-year-old was a boy headed for trouble. His father hoped that the responsibility and overseas life experience would change his son's attitude. In fact the culture shock does make him change, but not in the way his father hoped for...

SECOND GROWTH, by Joan L. Cannon

   Serge Dziminowicz is hampered by his past in a dysfunctional family. Having trained himself in self-sufficiency, he fends off approaches from women, shuns occasions for disappointment or betrayal. A college classmate is his only friend. He cannot trust others, or himself. 

   With success come real surprises. Through his professional ability, he meets not only a wife, but a new luxury, a startling attachment with horses, a budding appreciation for the natural world, and a child he adores.

   When his career and his marriage both are destroyed by his feckless father, his reputation and his livelihood in shambles, he is forced to leave behind everything that has become meaningful to him.

   In rural Vermont, he stumbles on a way of life that nourishes a second growth. A near tragedy is the catalyst that enables him to dare to trust. He ultimately learns he must lower his own barriers.

   Second Growth is about overcoming the past, about learning how to accept, as well as how to offer, help. A brilliant physician must find a way to heal himself — in spite of himself.

   MINISTER'S CORPORATE ESCAPADES, Reverend Castle Mystery Series, Vol. 2. by Celine Rose Mariotti.

   In the second book of the Rev. Castle series, the good reverend is solving another big case. This time he is solving a case of corporate sabotage and murder. Tyler Cotton’s environmental company is being sabotaged by four of his employees. Tyler asks Rev. Castle to find out what they’re doing and who’s involved. Rev. Castle sets out on a quest to find the saboteurs, gather the evidence, and bring them to justice. Meanwhile, Tyler is framed for the murder of Jacob Punch, one of the saboteurs.Can Rev.Castle prove that Tyler is innocent? The story has a climactic ending. And in the quest to solve this case, Rev. Castle falls in love with Lydia. A real page turner!

  

GAIA'S DREAM, A Collection of Poetry by Terry L. White

   Poetry that embraces the heart and the soul.  

LOVE BITES: A poetry Collection by Barbara Garro

  A Collection of poetry about all aspects of Love.

Jack' Substitute Cover

THE LIMITEDS, A Geocaching Mystery, Vol. 2. by Jennifer Kirsch

   Fourteen-year-old, Luke, dreams of spending July at Camp Unlimited, where campers explore cave networks, set off fireworks in pyrotech workshops, and sleep in tree house hammocks. But to get into the camp, Luke needs to demonstrate excellence in a sport, the arts, or school. More likely, he’ll end up at SURF, his town’s rec camp, where athlete’s foot, mildew, and warts plague the gym, bedbugs and lice infest the couches, and clumps of hair make frequent appearances in the burgers. When weird blobs start popping up on Luke’s computer, he’s too busy trying to complete his Unlimited application to notice. But when the blobs start looking like a secret, uncharted geocache, he and his friend Gabe follow their trail, only to find themselves battling superbug viruses and navigating labyrinths while on a quest to save lives.

BLEEDING HEARTS: Killian Kendall Mystery Series, Vol. 1

    Winner of the Stonewall Society's 2002 Pride in the Arts Literary Award in the Whodunit Category! 

    Killian Kendall is used to being overlooked, even in his own family. That's about to change. With the arrival of a new kid at school, Killian's whole world is about to be turned upside down. The new guy is openly gay and, for reasons he can't really understand, Killian finds himself drawn to him. When the boy is killed in a brutal attack, and Killian is injured in the process, Killian begins to questions everything around him. 

 REAP THE WHIRLWIND: Killian Kendall Mystery Series, Vol. 2,  by Josh Aterovis. 

    Suicide, or murder? That's the question in the second Killian Kendall mystery. Will Smith suspects murder when an old childhood pal drowns, and asks his friend Killian for help in solving the mystery.

TRUTH OF YESTERDAY,  by Josh Aterovis

ALL LOST THINGS, by Josh Aterovis

CHANGE  OF WORLDS, by Josh Aterovis 

 Jack's News!

  by your Official Bookstore Cat, 

and Gossip Columnist.

Hi Everyone,

   Not much else going on. No author promotions to report. Maybe they are all on vacation. 

   As for around here, Kathy and Sid brought us some fresh peaches. Roger said they were bitter, bit Arline has been lovin them every day for lunch.

   Well, folks, that's the Big News from the bookstore this week.  Please HELP! Send me some News, so I'll have something juicy  to write about. Juicy peaches? Not so much!

    Don't forget to let me know what's going on with all of you, so I have something cheerful to write about next time.

Just send an e-mail to arline@mail.com with 

 "News for Jack" 

 in the subject line, and

I'll make sure it shows up here for all the world to see!

A Cutting Commentary

by G. D. Gaetz

    Which is the real Claire Carlyle? The compliant housewife or the woman who seethes with pent up rage? Trapped in a violent marriage to a ruthless man, Claire knows Dennis will never let her leave. Desperate for a way out, Claire resorts to chopping up vegetables with a fourteen-inch butcher knife. She pretends they are body parts. She pretends they are Dennis.


Editorial Question from the e-mail:  As you know, I market small pieces to magazines mostly. Every editor wants something different and complains of something else! What do they want, anyway???

Answer: As you pointed out, each editor wants something different, and his requirements are designed to lighten his own workload.

 Speaking as a sometime editor, here’s MY list in order of importance:

    1. Good clean mistake-free copy that arrives well before deadline.

    2. Coherent and organized prose that is never confusing to the reader.

    3. Authors who will listen to what the editor is saying about the assignment and will produce the desired results the editor has asked for without going off on a tangent of their own.

    4. Authors who will pay attention to length requirements. Three thousand words means “Three thousand Words, or LESS”. It doesn’t mean 3001 words. Sending in assignments that are too long makes a great deal of work for your editor.

    5. Stories or information that readers will enjoy, or that will benefit them in some way. 

    6. Authors who don’t take unnecessary time. Who ask just enough questions to know what’s wanted then go away and produce it without talking about their grandchildren, dogs or in-growing toenails.

    7. Authors who don’t telephone or send twenty e-mails a day wanting to know when their book, or story, or article, will be finished and/or published. 

    8. Authors who listen to suggestions and produce results without whining.

    9. Clear, concise, informative prose without repetition or padding.

    10. Artistry with words.

Please notice that artistry is last on the list. No editor needs an author who calls to complain about what an editor changed and why.

Vampires R&R

Vampires on the Eastern Shore 

A Novel by Andy Nunez

   An eerie, hair-raising story of everyday people who become both the prey and preditor. Handsome young men were dying in the dark alleyways, expressions of bliss on their faces. Old women, prostitutes, and policemen, all were disappearing in a reign of terror, blood drained from their bodies. The problem was, they wouldn’t stay dead. 

   Police Sergeant Junior Gale was caught up in a web of deceit and destruction as two powerful forces battled in the dark streets and sewers of his city. Who was the mysterious High One unleashing a wave of undead creatures in a small town, where bored adulteresses and powerful businessmen mixed with evangelical revivalists and the dregs of society? Junior Gale had an eclectic mix of allies, but any one of them could be the High One, or the next victim. 

No Bake Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies

Enjoy these favorite cookies, while reading a 

chilling tale, to cool off.

INGREDIENTS:

• 2 Cup(s) granulated sugar
• 8 Tablespoon(s) (1 stick) margarine or butter
• 1/2 Cup(s) Low-fat milk
• 1/3 Cup(s) baking cocoa
• 3 Cup(s) Quaker® Quick Oats 

PREPARATION:

In large saucepan, combine sugar, margarine, milk and cocoa. Bring to boil over medium heat, stirring frequently. Continue boiling 3 minutes, stirring frequently. Remove from heat. Stir in oats.* Drop by tablespoonfuls onto waxed paper. Let stand until firm. Store tightly covered.

Happy August!

This Month's New Books are UP!

AUGUST 2016: Nat Watermelon Day, 3; Lighthouse Day, 7; Nat, S'Mores Day 10; Joke Day 12; Bad Poetry Day 14; Lefthander's Day 15; Ghost Festival 17; Women's Day 19; Kiss & Make Up Day 25; Dog Day 26; Nat. Heroes Day 29;

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