Stronger leads?--writing tip

Question from the e-mail: I've been stringing for the local newspaper, as you suggested and it's been going well so far. At least they pay me promptly and run everything I give them, but...the editor says my "leads are weak." Any idea how I can write stronger ones?

Answer: The lead is designed to catch the interest of the readers while filling them in on who? where? when? etc. If the lead has enough of a "catch" you can put the who, when and where elements in the second paragraph. Humor is good. You can get a bit whimsical with them, but never snide, or sarcastic.

For instance, if you were assigned to cover the local flower show held last Sunday, April 1, a simple lead might be: "The Green Thumbs Garden Club sponsored the flower show held under a bright spring sun after services last Sunday at St. Paul's United Methodist Church Parking lot." This lead will explain what the article is about and will gratify each and every member of the Green Thumbs And St. Pauls. It might be a good lead in your town, especially if the members are many and socially prominent. You would accompany it with digital color photos as well.

The article would then go on to describe the many plants, mention that starter plants had been for sale as a fundraiser for the community garden at the Senior Apartment complex, and list the winners in each division's competition, making sure their names were spelled correctly and connecting them where appropriate to well-known local people. Local subscribers love to see their names or the names of people they know in the paper in good contexts.

"Marjorie Pollen, the wife of our popular Mayor Herbert Pollen, won first prize in the table center piece division for her arrangement of honeysuckle and daffodils."

This is a feature piece, for color. Remember it's not "hard news."

Other possible leads might be Spring Bloomed Brightly on Easter Sunday. Or Green Thumbs-Up for Easter! Either of those would catch the eye of readers and the original lead would become paragraph two.

My all time best lead was, "Carl Tauber died three times on Christmas Eve and lived to tell about it." The second paragraph explained how the newly-implemented, city-based paramedic service had saved his life and went on to point out how lucky he was he didn't live 500 yards down the street in the county, where he'd have died once and stayed dead.

Ginger Cookies - Recipe

Brenda Boldin’s Ginger Cookies

2 cups self rising flour
(OR 2c. flour, 1tsp. baking powder, ½ tsp. baking soda, ½ tsp. salt)
1 tsp. ginger
11/2 tsp. cinnamon
1 tsp. ground cloves
½ tsp nutmeg
1/2 cup sugar
½ cup shortening
½ cup molasses
1 egg yolk

Mix sugar and shortening; add molasses and egg yolk. Sir in dry ingredients. Roll on lightly floured surface, 1/4 inch thick. Cut out shapes. Bake on lightly greased cookie sheets at 350-F or 177-C degrees for 10 minutes.

Cool before removing from cookie sheet.
Makes approx. 30 cookies.

Contributed by Brenda Boldin, author of the Alex Masters Series, Dead Birds Don’t Sing, Jailbird, and A Bird by Any Other Name...Alex Masters is back, calling herself “Lexi” now, and working a real job in her brother’s software company. Money disappears, disks go missing, then a dead body turns up, and once again Alex/Lexi is suspect Number One.

Catching UP! and Contest Information!

Still working on data entry for quarterly payment to authors.

No books went to press:

No galleys went out:

But here's some news about a contest:

CONTEST: Best Indie Books of 2012

Time for The Kindle Book Review's biggest contest EVER.

We want to find the best independent and small press Kindle books published between April 1, 2011 and April 1, 2012. If you think your book has what it takes, submit today! We are giving away up to $2,100 worth of prizes including cash, ebooks, advertising packages, and a Kindle Fire!

What's at stake? The six winners will receive $100 cash each and an advertising package with The Kindle Book Review. The categories are (Fiction Only):

• Mystery/Thriller
• Romance
• Suspense/Horror
• Literary Fiction
• Sci-fi/Fantasy
• YA

Readers can win too! We will give away a Kindle Fire to one lucky winner, loaded with some of the very best indie books out there. This is the "Reader's Grand Prize Package". Readers can register to win a FREE Kindle Fire and free books. We are also giving away kindle books every week at random to readers who register! All other prizes will be awarded on October 1, 2012.



Register Now!
Authors Register Here($15 entry fee)
Readers Register Here(free)


Contest Rules and Conditions for Authors:
We will NOT accept more than one (1) entry per author, so send your very best work. We will stop accepting submissions on May 15, 2012.

Who can enter? Any independent or small press author who has published a novel (fiction only) in the Kindle store between April 15, 2011 and April 15, 2012. Entries must fit into one of the five categories listed above. We do not accept erotica.

How to enter?
There are Only 2 steps to enter.

1.) Fill out the registration form here.

2.) Pay $15 registration fee upon completing registration form.

Easy as pie!

IMPORTANT: We can NOT accept Smashwords coupon codes. We can NOT accept .doc files, or gifted books. We only accept the following kindle formats: AZW, MOBI, PRC, GIF, and PNG. If you need to covert your file to a MOBI (Kindle format) click HERE (works best with no page numbers and headers in file). We will give away one copy of the semi-finalist's, finalist's, and winner's books in the "Reader's Grand Prize Package" and with weekly "giveaways".

How does the contest work?

~ We will pre-screen all books.

~ Our screeners will read your book until they are either turned on or turned off.

~ If you hook us, we will enter your book in the semi-finals, and pass your book on to the judges.

~ We will post semi-finalists on July 1, 2012.

~ If our judges do not think your book is one of the top books of the 2012, they may stop reading.

~ Our judges will choose 5 finalists in each genre. The five finalists will be posted on September 1, 2012

~ We will announce the "Grand Prize Winners" of each genre on October 1, 2012. Grand prize winners will receive $100 cash, a free Twitterlicious Social Media Buzz and a one month Sponsorship ad.

What are we looking for?

~We are simply looking for the very best indie books out there. We are judging quality of writing, quality of plot, and quality of ebook formatting (a complete professional product). If you want to be a winner, you must grab our attention and keep it from the beginning. If you do not hook us, we will close your book. We are NOT looking for mediocrity. We are looking for the very best, as subjective as that is. We are doing this for fun and so that you can have bragging rights. Each book that passes the screening process will be judged by a lover of the genre. We will honor all semi-finalists (anyone who passes the pre-screening process), and the finalists with a special post and a bunch of tweets. And you can add your title (i.e. "Winner" or "Semi-Finalist" or "Finalist"in The Kindle Book Review's Best Indie Books of 2012) on your Kindle book page!

What not to do:

Do not email us and inquire about your status/results. We will not respond to inquiries.

Do not send doc files, jpg, pdf or any unformatted Kindle files.

REGISTER NOW! The deadline is May 15, 2012.

Mary Cox-Bilz’s Dandelion Wine

1 gallon Boiling water
2 qt. Dandelion blossoms
3 lb Sugar
1 Lemon; thinly sliced
1 tbsp Good yeast (If using powdered yeast, mix 1 pkg. in half a cup of lukewarm water before adding to the pot and do NOT add it until after pot cools to lukewarm.

Put blossoms in a large kettle and pour boiling water over them. Let stand 1 hour. Strain, add sugar to liquid, boil a little and skim. Allow to Cool.

When lukewarm, add lemon and yeast. Let stand 24 hours, then strain and put into sterilized clean Mason Jars or wine jugs, filling full as it’s working (with some room at the top) until only the impurities (lemon, etc.) are left in the bottom of the pot. The wine will be a beautiful pale gold color.

(In making this wine, be careful to keep all stems out, as they make the wine taste rank and give it a dark color). Seal tightly.

Contributor’s Note: Since I’m quadriplegic, I’ll get my sister Donna or my niece Jennifer to pick the dandelions. Then my Mom or Dad will do the thing with the boiling water, sugar, and Mason Jars. Then if it turns out well, I’ll just smile and say, “It’s my recipe!”

Contributed by Mary Cox-Bilz, author of At the Gate Called Beautiful, the story of Jesus's miracles...

Beef and Vegetable Rolls - recipe

Ray Morand’s Beef and Vegetable Rolls
(Gyuhire yasai maki)

1 medium carrot
4 oz asparagus
4 oz French beans
12 oz prime beef, sliced paper thin
Cornstarch or potato flour
Vegetable oil
(Alternative: green onions instead of asparagus)

Sauce:
1 Tbsp. Sugar
1 Tbsp. Water
1 Tbsp. Sake
1 Tbsp. Mirin
3 Tbsp. soy sauce


Scrape the carrot and cut into long narrow strips. Trim the asparagus. Top and tail the beans. Parboil the vegetable separately in lightly salted water until just tender. Drain immediately and refresh in cold water. Drain and pat dry. Lay half the meat slices side by side with edges overlaying to form a sheet. Press overlapping sections so they stick and brush with cornstarch. (Alternative, marinate meat in sauce for ½ hour)

Lay a few strips of each vegetable at one end and roll up firmly. Tie securely with white cotton string. Repeat with remaining meat and vegetables. Combine the sauce ingredients in a bowl and stir well. Put a little oil into a frying pan and heat over high heat. Add the rolls and sauté until lightly brown.

Pour the sauce over the rolls and bring to a simmer. Continue to simmer over a low heat for five minutes, until the beef is tender and well flavored. Cut the strings and slice the rolls into 1-inch rounds. Arrange on individual serving dishes and spoon over a little sauce. Arrange on porcelain dish and garnish with parsley.

Contributed by Ray Morand, author of The Red Knight Chronicles

What is "tension?" -- writing tip

Question: An agent returned my manuscript and said I need "more tension." Any idea what she means by that?

Answer: The term tension, in fiction writing, has to do with the amount of stake the reader has in your characters. The more the reader cares what happens to your protagonist, the more tension there is.

I know I sound like a broken record here, about the motivation thing, but Good Motivation can and does increase tension. Agents have said (to me) that a manuscript with middle sag "lacks tension." If the first turning point is resolved and we're building toward the crisis, but nothing much is going on right then, tension can be increased by inserting action that magnifies the danger to the hero or heroine. And any scene that makes it look like the protagonist is in danger of losing what he or she wants in the story can increase tension.

Anything the reader can identify with that hurts or embarrasses the character can increase tension as well. In one of Dick Francis's titles, his hero, Sid Halley, has lost the use of his hand. He is embarrassed that he can't cut up his food at a formal dinner with his ex-wife, who makes fun of his handicap. That kind of scene can increase tension.

And in Francis's book, he slid the clues to the real killer right into the dinner conversation while I was so distracted I missed them completely.

Wild Rice Casserole -- Recipe

Carlene Dater’s Wild Rice Casserole

1 cup wild rice
½ lb. fresh or 2 cans mushrooms
¾ cup butter
3 Tbsp. grated onion
3 cups chicken broth

Soak and wash rice 3 or 4 times in boiling water till rice opens up. Slice fresh mushrooms. Brown rice in butter; add remaining ingredients except broth. Put into buttered 2 ½ quart casserole. Add broth. Cover and bake at 350-F or 177-C for about 1 ½ or 2 hours. Takes a while, but well worth it.

Recipe from Carlene Dater, author of THE COLORS OF DEATH and EXTRA PAIR OF EYES.